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The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck by Mark Manson is the most brutal self-help book you will ever read. From intense swearing to virtually insulting you, Manson has a way of handing you a plate full of explanations about humans, a slap in the face and advice on how to move on from there. Having been through various significant life events, like a friend’s suicide and having been unemployed because of the 2007/2008 recession, in addition to a sprinkle of bad relationships, Manson has a wealth of advice to hand out to people that he knows will positively impact them.
Before reading it, I will admit that I was worried that this would be like other self-help/advice books - spurting the same old information with no real evidence, ending in the realisation that the author is only 25 and has little to no real-life experiences. I was wrong. Manson is not only able to provide his own life experiences but can draw on events from others to back his point up.
One of the best things about this book is the feeling of being taken along for the ride in such a way that you experience emotions, that you laugh, maybe even cry, but still come away with tangible actions you can do to improve your life. Throughout, I never felt as though information was being withheld, or like I was only receiving half-truths. Manson will tell you how it is straight – most of us are selfish, self-centred, keen to victimise ourselves and most of all, we’re not special. Hearing this less than 50 pages into a book is quite the experience (especially since I listened to the audiobook and, boy, did it feel like a lecture), but I was thankful that I didn’t have to listen to pages of useless anecdotes only for the author to say “go to therapy, do some exercise” because Manson acknowledges the dynamic flaws in society.
This book has really allowed me to see that persuading myself that I’m in a good place in my life can be just as detrimental to my health as knowing I’m in a bad place. Manson argues that constantly wanting to improve yourself and only experiencing positive things is evidence of a negative experience. Self-improvement, in a roundabout way, is negative because you realise that you aren’t where you want to be, so you keep trying to change. To finish this line of thought, he will also quite coldly say that most people are satisfied once they go through these ‘improvement measures’, just to reiterate the fact that most of us want something that won’t ever truly make us happy. Like I said, brutal advice.
If you’re someone who is ready to listen to how every one of us is a slave to our emotions and will never really deal with them, you definitely have to read this book. If you’re not at a stage of your life where you can handle being sworn at for 20 pages then perhaps start with something lighter, but this book will inevitably reveal brutal truths to you that the people in your life, and your therapist, won’t tell you to your face.
Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐/5